167 replies to this topic

[Luminosity]

What's bothering you right now?

What's bugging you?

What's sticking in your craw?


Please don't use this thread to write about this site.

Supportive feedback only, please.

Please, no advice or criticism to the posters.

 

PLEASE DON'T USE RATING SYSTEM ON THIS THREAD. THANK YOU.

Edited by YOLF, 29 May 2015 - 04:42 AM.

[Luminosity]

I feel like there's no place for me, no safe harbor, no place for me to bloom and be accepted. I see the things that life consists of being eroded. I see more and more effort needed to stay in the same place. I see not enough joy. I want to avoid life tasks. I want to avoid chores and live in a netherworld, like the internet, gossip, television, disconnected and entertained into a trance.

[Luminosity]

I'm in the library right now. The new computers have large flat screens but the print is faint and broken up. Even though there's plenty of room in the library, I am about a foot from the person next to me. It makes me mad. I'm looking at an empty table next to me the size of a bathroom, for people to "wait" for their chance to use the computers. They could put some of the computers on that table. The librarians' computers are six feet from each other. It just makes me steamed. And all the new books suck! Total waste of money. They just tore down a stone library near my home and built a much bigger one for 7 million dollars, to house the few bad books they will be able to afford along with a collection of moldy decades old murder mysteries. Their computers will also be cranky, and crowded together. God forbid we should have study carrels or anything that might make us productive. It really makes me mad because we should be supporting people who use public resources, not undermining them. We should be competing to see how excellent such things can be. I feel disgusted and despair. It seems like our tax dollars always go to the wrong place. I would really like a world that wraps around me supportively and I deserve that. Others do to and we'd all be better off if it was like that.

[Luminosity]

What a day. I went to consultation with some hairdressers and they were such jerks! What a way to start the morning. I got out of bed before eight before that and was rushing around to make the appointment. I was so agitated that I wrote six negative reviews of them online. That has been hours. I think I had to join a lot of sites and that was it's own thing. They are such jerks. There's just no excuse the that!!!!!!!

Urggggh. The last thing I expected was to be insulted. That was no unnecessary. Argggghhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!! What a-holes. I just spent most of three or four hours dealing with this. I didn't expect or need this. I was p*ssed. Urgggghhhhhhhhhhh! Why are there so many things wrong with hairdressers!!!!!!!! Why do disturbed? Why can't they do their jobs properly?

At least someone I know who came up to me while I was posting these reviews all over the internet (and you never know if the review site is mobbed up or has gotten mobbed up when you try to post the reviews) and she said my hair looks nice, and she had a nice dog for me to pet. One of these idiots said I had "thin" hair. My hair is three times thicker than his hair! It's twice as thick as a normal persons. What the f!@#$.

These are super @#$holes. What is the purpose of such bad behavior. Why can't they have better hairdressing schools where these teach these people how to behave!

You think you have a half hour errand, but you have a four hour thing and I feel afraid that I don't have that much more in a day. I didn't want these !@#holes to hijack my day, but they did. What can you do? What you you do?

Urghhhhh!!!!! What jerks. There has to be some better hairdressers out there than this.

Urghhhh. Urghhhhhh! ARghhhhh. Urrmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Mmmmmfffffffff!!!

*****

Edited by Luminosity, 07 October 2011 - 12:58 AM.

[ViolettVol]

I feel like there's no place for me, no safe harbor, no place for me to bloom and be accepted. I see the things that life consists of being eroded. I see more and more effort needed to stay in the same place. I see not enough joy. I want to avoid life tasks. I want to avoid chores and live in a netherworld, like the internet, gossip, television, disconnected and entertained into a trance.

Wow, that you wrote here realy spoke to me. I dread life tasks, they seem so difficult, mundane and actually the thought of them sometimes maekes me nauseous. I feel much better in the netherworld of the internet, television,, all that world that might be someone's reality but is not mine. I'm aslo scared shtless of aging of seeing decay in me and around me - i cannot see the purpose of stuff if all rushed toward decay. I'm bothered by my constant low moods, lack of belief in myself and the fear that my dreams are endangered because I'm too weak to fight for them. I dont want to change physically, I just want to remain looking the way I do and just become wiser and stronger and then show the world what I can accomplish because deep down inside is the hope that I can, I can I can really wow them !!!

[ViolettVol]

I want to remain youthful forever, I ant to have a youthful face ad body yet it seems no matter how hard I try its not enough, so what do I do, I'm not god at acceptance. I wont get old easily I wont go off into thet gentle night and whatever other shit the poet wrote
I WANNA BE YOUNG AND STRONG AN POWERFUL FOREVER/ Call ME NUTS, THATS WHAT I WANT!!!!~!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[hivemind]

I have achieved my mental and physical peak. From now on there will only be gradual decline in intelligence, strength, health and looks.

In the near future I will be obsolete. After that I will die.

Edited by Trip, 01 November 2011 - 03:43 PM.

[ViolettVol]

I have achieved my mental and physical peak. From now on there will only be gradual decline in intelligence, strength, health and looks.

In the near future I will be obsolete. After that I will die.

I don't understand your posts. Seen them in a couple of threads and they're all similar to this what is the point?

[hivemind]

What's the point of this thread?

I just said what is bothering me.

Edited by Trip, 01 November 2011 - 10:25 PM.

[ViolettVol]

What's the point of this thread?

I just said what is bothering me.

Ok I get it now how youe feel. But maybe there's hope? dont you se hope anywhere?

[hivemind]

What's the point of this thread?

I just said what is bothering me.

Ok I get it now how youe feel. But maybe there's hope? dont you se hope anywhere?

I'm not sure if I need hope. It will just be a new experience for me, the middle age. It is really another reality than the one in which I have lived so far. Not there yet though.

[ViolettVol]

What's the point of this thread?

I just said what is bothering me.

Ok I get it now how youe feel. But maybe there's hope? dont you se hope anywhere?

I'm not sure if I need hope. It will just be a new experience for me, the middle age. It is really another reality than the one in which I have lived so far. Not there yet though.

To me it's a reality I dont like. I like myself young and the thought of becoming less good-looking, less physically capable frightens me. That is why agign bothers me and I hope it will be cured in my time.

[Luminosity]

Thank you ViolettVol and Trip for your posts. This thread hopes to be a safe place to say whatever is bothering you, no matter how many times you may have said so elsewhere. It doesn't have to make sense either. Limiting any feedback to kind words is appreciated.

I think we touched on some deep subjects, aging, lack of hope, feeling overwhelmed, feeling that the world doesn't have a place for us.

[ViolettVol]

Thank you ViolettVol and Trip for your posts. This thread hopes to be a safe place to say whatever is bothering you, no matter how many times you may have said so elsewhere. It doesn't have to make sense either. Limiting any feedback to kind words is appreciated.

I think we touched on some deep subjects, aging, lack of hope, feeling overwhelmed, feeling that the world doesn't have a place for us.

You're right, there should be a safe harbour for us to vent and hear only kind words Trip (I recall my earlier post questioning what you wriote) and Luminosity, I'm sending my positive thoughts to you right now and hoping things that bother you happen less and things that make you happy happen more and more often I hope that for mysellf too
This is such an awesome idea Luminosity, - this thread. I feel a deep need of just being comforted and accepted and not challenged and it bothers me so few people are ready to provide that.

I need hugs often but usually am alone or too afraid to ask casual friends for them because they might think I'm weird. It bothers me.
It bothers me that most of my friends seem to think getting married and having kids is a duty at our age and when they do, they are not as available to me as they once were, but I dont want a hubby and kids, I just want my student life forever. It bothers me things are expected of me with age.
It bothers me some people think I;'m pitiful because 'm not married yet even though I dont want to be.
It bothers me my mom does not take care of her health.
It bothers me I'm so easily scared.
It bothers me my anxiety prevents me from progressing in life.
It bothers me I did not go to music school and dont have my dreamed up singing career.

But still, I just want to send alll of my warmest emotions out to all of you that need them and hope someone does this for me too
So trip and luminosity, feel yourselves hugged and the rest of you who need it as well!

[JLL]

I'm feeling pretty damn good at the moment, but I have to say that the darkness that has descended upon Finland is a handful to deal with. Yesterday I worked all day in a windowless room, and when I left, it was already dark at 4.30 PM. That sucks.

[Droplet]

It bothers me that most of my friends seem to think getting married and having kids is a duty at our age and when they do, they are not as available to me as they once were, but I dont want a hubby and kids, I just want my student life forever. It bothers me things are expected of me with age.
It bothers me some people think I;'m pitiful because I'm not married yet even though I dont want to be.
It bothers me my mom does not take care of her health.

I hear you there! Though I must admit that I get more of the discrimination for my lifestyle choices from society than my friends. I hate being pitied for being unmarried. It's expensive to get into that contract and even more so to get out of it. It's not as if it is neccessary nowadays like it was years back. For me personally not believing in a caring God or wanting kids, it is pointless. Even if I fell in love, I can think of many better ways to waste our cash.

Some of my family members also don't look after their health like they should (my mother but also others) and it bothers me.

Now I'm bothered by how shit the current economy is. I hear all this doom and gloom and wonder if I'll ever move on/progress.

[Luminosity]

Thanks for your posts ViolettVol, JLL and Droplet. I appreciate your change of heart ViolettVol. Thanks for the best wishes. I am impressed with how you are accessing your feelings.

Finland, wow, that's exotic to me. A whole different world.

Sorry people are giving you grief for being unmarried, Droplet, and the family members who aren't looking after their health, and the economy.

[Ark]

One of my Cousins didn't want to be my friend on facebook, i found out because i installed a un-friend program.

Kinda stressful this cuz just wished me a happy birthday the other day, i sense she thinks strange things about me.

But whatever, to bad you can't choose your family like you can choose your friends. LOL

[Ark]

One of my Cousins didn't want to be my friend on facebook, i found out because i installed a un-friend program.

Kinda stressful this cuz just wished me a happy birthday the other day, i sense she thinks strange things about me.

But whatever, to bad you can't choose your family like you can choose your friends. LOL

[TheFountain]

People anger the fuck out of me.

I despise different types of people for different reasons.

I can't stand stupid hillbillies who do nothing with their lives but lurch around, smoking, drinking, greying, balding, aging, etc. The sight of such cretins makes me sick to my stomach. They are a sign of the decrepitude that has befallen society through both the economy and our cultural bankruptsy. These people are essentially USELESS to society. And possibly one reason suicide should be legalized.

I can't stand these self important college preppie douche bags who I have to see on campus every day who walk around with their complacent facial expressions and their unoriginal, boring haircuts, personalities and approaches to just about everything, yet still manage to think they are something special, when in fact they are followers of the herd. Furthermore I can't stand their slut girlfriends whose only useful purpose in life seems to be as a baby making machine (at least my girlfriend has some self restraint and common sense not to want children yet).

I can't stand these fake metrosexual, peevish pricks I see at book stores and other such places of congregation. I have a massive amount of respect for gays, but I really despise these metrosexuals with their fake, whiny voices who only act gay-ish to get laid because they assume females like it these days. This kind of deceitful self interest not only doesn't impress me it makes me want to puke large amounts of unknown, multi-colored fluids all over these cretin pricks. I think it would fancy up their boring wardrobes a little actually.

I despise people the FACT that so many americans are uneducated and clueless about the basic nature of reality to the degree that it still makes them idiotic provincial thinkers who refuse to see outside the scope of americanomics and these old fucks who live in the 50s mind set of still believing america is ahead of every other country in terms of innovation, development and civility. lolol

I hate idiots who gratuitously watch violent garbage programming like UFC and MMA and think they are tough guys after they get an ever so slight jolt of adrenaline after watching a few episodes of these monkeys kicking punching and ass raping each other till either one is 'defeated' or they reach a 'draw'. God this kind of shit is so pathetic it's ALMOST not funny....

And lastly I can't FUCKING stand religious morons who fight for their right to preach against other peoples right to equally use their freedom of speech by telling them to fuck off. I think it is sad and pathetic that grown men and women still believe that the world is only 12000 years old and they won't accept the fact that the bible is essentially a work of metaphor and fiction. I equally despise how these stupid bastards cannot accept other religious or spiritual views as equally valid, or invalid, as theirs. It pisses me off that the only decent spiritual doctrine that has survived into the modern age, I.E buddhism, is neglected by the western world, when the truth is this country could learn a fuck of a lot from these teachings, not the least of which is HUMILITY!

Anyway, that's about it for now.

Edited by TheFountain, 07 November 2011 - 11:25 PM.

[mikeinnaples]

That was a pretty nice rant even if I dont agree with -all- of it.

[ViolettVol]

Sometimes a rant does one so much good ! Right now I'm bothered by my susceptibility to anxiety and dependence on meds to cure it. And it bothers me that I see everything in negative colors most of the time. It bothers me i'm so un-motivated and yet want to accomplish so much.

[Droplet]

Sometimes a rant does one so much good ! Right now I'm bothered by my susceptibility to anxiety and dependence on meds to cure it. And it bothers me that I see everything in negative colors most of the time. It bothers me i'm so un-motivated and yet want to accomplish so much.

I know I've said this elsewhere but I really do swear by it and that is going for NLP/hypnotherapy. My anxiety was more or less ruining my life but after these therapies, I have been able to do so much more and live a mostly comfortable life where I can deal with stresses a lot more easily. It may not be for you but it worked miracles for me! I just regret not going for it a lot sooner.

And lastly I can't FUCKING stand religious morons who fight for their right to preach against other peoples right to equally use their freedom of speech by telling them to fuck off. I think it is sad and pathetic that grown men and women still believe that the world is only 12000 years old and they won't accept the fact that the bible is essentially a work of metaphor and fiction. I equally despise how these stupid bastards cannot accept other religious or spiritual views as equally valid, or invalid, as theirs. It pisses me off that the only decent spiritual doctrine that has survived into the modern age, I.E buddhism, is neglected by the western world, when the truth is this country could learn a fuck of a lot from these teachings, not the least of which is HUMILITY!

Damn how I agree with you on that! I have respect for those who are spiritual/religious but not if they take their beliefs to extremes and/or prevent other people practising their beliefs in peace. Whilst I'm not Buddhist, what I do understand (correct me otherwise) is that it is a religion that encourages questioning of the teachings rather than telling everyone who dares to question them that they are off to eternal damnation. I think that is a very good thing. Still, at least fundies provide some comedy gold at times.

Edited by Droplet, 08 November 2011 - 07:28 PM.

[TheFountain]

Sometimes a rant does one so much good ! Right now I'm bothered by my susceptibility to anxiety and dependence on meds to cure it. And it bothers me that I see everything in negative colors most of the time. It bothers me i'm so un-motivated and yet want to accomplish so much.

I know I've said this elsewhere but I really do swear by it and that is going for NLP/hypnotherapy. My anxiety was more or less ruining my life but after these therapies, I have been able to do so much more and live a mostly comfortable life where I can deal with stresses a lot more easily. It may not be for you but it worked miracles for me! I just regret not going for it a lot sooner.

And lastly I can't FUCKING stand religious morons who fight for their right to preach against other peoples right to equally use their freedom of speech by telling them to fuck off. I think it is sad and pathetic that grown men and women still believe that the world is only 12000 years old and they won't accept the fact that the bible is essentially a work of metaphor and fiction. I equally despise how these stupid bastards cannot accept other religious or spiritual views as equally valid, or invalid, as theirs. It pisses me off that the only decent spiritual doctrine that has survived into the modern age, I.E buddhism, is neglected by the western world, when the truth is this country could learn a fuck of a lot from these teachings, not the least of which is HUMILITY!

Damn how I agree with you on that! I have respect for those who are spiritual/religious but not if they take their beliefs to extremes and/or prevent other people practising their beliefs in peace. Whilst I'm not Buddhist, what I do understand (correct me otherwise) is that it is a religion that encourages questioning of the teachings rather than telling everyone who dares to question them that they are off to eternal damnation. I think that is a very good thing. Still, at least fundies provide some comedy gold at times.

It was a comment specifically aimed at western cult-like religious thinking. The kind of thinking which condemns science and forward thinking concepts because it is not in line with its fairytale dogma. I don't think modern Buddhists do this, nor is their any recent history, to my knowledge, of Buddhism being used to trump up wars or to try and shut other people out, such as gays or other minority groups. Which is why I think it is perhaps the only useful spiritual doctrine left to the human race. It's incorruptible, because it's message is essentially one mind, one heart, one movement, through peace, meditation and knowledge of the universe.

[Droplet]

It was a comment specifically aimed at western cult-like religious thinking. The kind of thinking which condemns science and forward thinking concepts because it is not in line with its fairytale dogma. I don't think modern Buddhists do this, nor is their any recent history, to my knowledge, of Buddhism being used to trump up wars or to try and shut other people out, such as gays or other minority groups. Which is why I think it is perhaps the only useful spiritual doctrine left to the human race. It's incorruptible, because it's message is essentially one mind, one heart, one movement, through peace, meditation and knowledge of the universe.

I see what you mean now.

[1kgcoffee]

-My father and his religion. It boils my blood how no amount of reason/logic can penetrate the brainwashing he suffered as a kid. His refusal to question it, or to accept me as an atheist has had a negative effect on our relationship.
-People who think that sunscreen is for sissies.
-People who believe that being health conscious is vain and pointless. Hedonists who are proud of their fat waists and sagging faces. Put down the ice cream and grab a barbell you disgusting pigs!
-Ignorance in general.

[manic_racetam]

I feel frustrated that I can't seem to motivate myself to accomplish anything. I feel frustrated that I can't really articulate how I feel. I am upset that I recognize the fear to talk to strangers as an artifact of my social conditioning but still can't get past the fear to talk to them.

The sense of melancholy I have about my life in general. The fact that I ignore that melancholy and pretend that it isn't there. The fear of facing the issues/memories that are causing the daily pain in my life. The sense of cowardice I have with me at most times and the reinforcing nature of taking no actions to remedy it.

People around me and that know me well seem to think and say I have it all together. But I feel like a mess most of the time. Cognitively I understand that I'm in a pretty sweet situation right now but emotionally and likely spiritually it doesn't seem to match up. I'm desperately lonely, or at least feel that way.

I've recently been indulging in the "victim" mentality and it really bothers me when I realize it. I stopped drinking alcohol over nine months ago and I'm frustrated. Frustrated that I'm scared of facing my demons and doing the work it will take to make myself feel better. Honestly I'm still trying to find the easier way out through medication/supplements but I know that will only be of use with some action on my part.

I'm very internalized and a bit narcissistic and wish that I could just express myself without fear of rejection.

Nice thread, thanks for that.

[hivemind]

I'm going to an IQ-test. It bothers me. I will get some kind of limit to my abilities, and IQ is hugely hereditical. Also, IQ only gets lower when you age. There's no way for me to be smarter than this in the future.

[ViolettVol]

I feel frustrated that I can't seem to motivate myself to accomplish anything. I feel frustrated that I can't really articulate how I feel. I am upset that I recognize the fear to talk to strangers as an artifact of my social conditioning but still can't get past the fear to talk to them.

The sense of melancholy I have about my life in general. The fact that I ignore that melancholy and pretend that it isn't there. The fear of facing the issues/memories that are causing the daily pain in my life. The sense of cowardice I have with me at most times and the reinforcing nature of taking no actions to remedy it.

People around me and that know me well seem to think and say I have it all together. But I feel like a mess most of the time. Cognitively I understand that I'm in a pretty sweet situation right now but emotionally and likely spiritually it doesn't seem to match up. I'm desperately lonely, or at least feel that way.

I've recently been indulging in the "victim" mentality and it really bothers me when I realize it. I stopped drinking alcohol over nine months ago and I'm frustrated. Frustrated that I'm scared of facing my demons and doing the work it will take to make myself feel better. Honestly I'm still trying to find the easier way out through medication/supplements but I know that will only be of use with some action on my part.

I'm very internalized and a bit narcissistic and wish that I could just express myself without fear of rejection.

Nice thread, thanks for that.

WOW, you just wrote what I feel most of the time - I can completely identify with all the issues you presented and you articulated them beautifully. Thank you so much. And you are not alone, at least virtually *hugs from lonely Violett*

Edited by ViolettVol, 14 November 2011 - 12:03 AM.

[chrono]

Right now? Insomnia; lots of it! ~_~