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[Andersen]

I’m going on like 4 years since I graduated high school when I abused adderall and mdma very heavily. Honestly I have not felt right since. I eat well, try to sleep good, am sober aside from the occasional mushroom/tab trip, and I was exercising a whole lot. I’m very awkward and depressed a lot of days. I rarely have really good days or feel motivated to do things. It’s hard for me to stick with a job or get into anything new. I have a lack of emotion, and my head is very foggy. A lot of time all I want is to be able to be myself again, yet I’m thankful I’m stilll Alive and healthy. I’m pretty functional for the
Most part, but I’m not who I was mentally.. I forget things, I’m very disorganized speech wise, and I overthink and worry about a lot. It’s very possible I had a little bit of problems before the drug usage, but I deff feel a bit differnt than who I used to be. I’m 21 years old. I make a lot of wrong decision, say weird things and have a hard time changing these things. I used to buy half grams, to grams of mdma pretty potent and just rail lines with friends all night while drinking. I used to buy any ash’s medicine I could find and take it because it made me feel good in high school.. I was unaware of proper usage and it deff impacted my mentality and mindset as a person entirely.

I’m thankful for the experiences and lessons I have had and learned but I constantly feel I’m not in the place I want to be, and I might not ever be the same but I will keep trying to find things to help. The thing is, I’m not sure where to turn anymore. I suppose I’m going to start trying some supplements like suggested to help with nuerotoxicity, but something in me feels I need to seek proffessional help. I just don’t know if there is much they can do. I don’t want to be on useless medication for ever, and I’m scared to take that leap. I stumbled across this subreddit the other day, I’m really not even sure what it is, but there were a lot of posts about mdma so I’m putting my story out there. If you have any suggestions or information that might be able to aid me or someone in my situation.. please share. I advise everyone to stay away from mdma and just take tested psychs instead.. but if you are going to use these drugs, research, take precautions/ and supplements, and measure your doses ,space out doses, test your powder, and never redose . It’s seriously not worth it.

Also don’t take adhd medicine. Don’t care who you are . It’s shit and not worth it. I personally don’t beleive in adhd medicine but if you think you have it you still probably shouldn’t take medicine like that. Just saying. Keep it easy and much love

[makemoneyskipowder]

Just an idea, I did a sort of meditation / neural rehab program for an issue I had.  if you read my posts you will get the background, but I also am sure there was a neurotoxicity element with what I was dealing with.  The program has worked for people that had neurotoxicity injuries of all types, and actually developed for stuff that was non-drug related, i.e. chemical exposure (industrial chem), ptsd injuries, etc., and I think people with 'pharma' injuries just started applying it and getting good results.  I have a family member who was in vietnam, and came back very damaged, with all types of issues, which were labeled Chronic Fatigue Syndrome, and he slept 18-20 hrs a day, and has had all types of surgeries and whatever else, and I wish I could get him to try it.  the basic science they base it off of is that neurons can reconnect / re-establish connections, and overtime if you apply this your brain will start to do this, and start to function normally again, and it works around whatever damaged neural connections you had.  I tried everything else, don't mean to sound at all like i am pushing the program.  I didn't put much faith in it to begin with and gave it a shot, and am glad I did.  check my prior posts for info, if you want.  lmk if you do and good luck