I'm new to the boards so this will be my introductory post. To provide a brief background on my myself, I’m 22 years old and early 2009 was when I enrolled myself in an ADHD clinical trial I heard advertised over the radio. I was unable to address my cognitive problems earlier because I was without adequate health insurance and always felt there was something to be gained by learning how to persevere in life despite one's personality foibles. This is something my parents impressed upon me. It’s not as though they maintained an aversion to perscription medications but it was always suggested that I take a wait-and-see approach and learn how to compensate for my difficulties by cultivating behavioral changes and learning how to adapt. I don’t disagree with this thinking and seeing how I was in my formative years when I first began expressing these concerns I think it was responsible of them to put of medicating me. Now, however, as an adult who is cognizant enough to realize a definite problem exists and is feeling the detrimental impact of it I’ve chosen to find a way to mitigate it. Mental mediocrity is something I’m no longer willing to settle for.
I never displayed characteristics consistent with typical ADHD growing up but my subpar mental acuity throughout school and into my short-lived foray into community college was always due to my lack of ability to study. I always accepted that lack of discipline was a possible reason for my below average performance but in hindsight, discipline is not something that I inherently lack. Ability to maintain interest, focus, and to parse the information I’m receiving are far and away more accurate explanations for being a marginal student.
Taking on a new, mentally demanding and high stress job recently has motivated me to seek help in order better prepare myself for success. Working in a fast paced environment which requires me to manage people all day and maintain a constant awareness of many different facets of the business I run has proven very difficult for my inattentive brain. Nearly impossible. Perhaps the most frustrating thing about this condition is not being able to properly articulate how it affects me. Sure, I can rattle off a laundry list of symptoms just as easily as the next person but fatigue, lack of motivation, inability to focus, extreme difficulty assimiliating information and social avoidance could be attributed to any number of disorders, couldn’t it?
I recently learned about ADD of the inattentive variety, or SCT, and felt that the characterization of this disorder summed up my problems with impressive accuracy. I was fortunate to be chosen to participate in the aforementioned ADHD clinical trial not because the trial compound I tested yeilded any results for me but because it afforded me several months worth of courtesy visits with a psychiastrist who graciously allowed me to explore two types of drug therapy: methylphenidate and amphetimines; which ultimately I was able to rule out as effective forms of treatment. First I tried the generic form of Ritalin 20MG IR and eventually the ER version but decided it wasn’t for me due the hypomania followed by the downward spiral in mood it induced. The crash (which featured a flat affect) was enough for me to stop treatment. After Ritalin came Adderall XR 20MG and after that came Vyvanse. I experienced noticeable gains in productivity using both Adderall and Vyvanse but still the crashes and desire to fixate on trivial details while on them has prompted me to look for something more effective that treats the broader range of my symptoms. Adderall and Vyvanse only alleviated parts of my condition as they gave me an increased focus (a focus that at times was so intense that it became impractical) and provided only a transient boost in energry and mental alertness.
My goal is to find a substance or perhaps a cocktail (as small as possible) that addresses my ADHD-PI symptoms more organically. What I mean by this is that I want to feel as though these deficits are being corrected instead of feeling like a med-head all day. Anyone who has taken Ritalin or Adderall knows when they’re on it because they speed you up making you ready to clean, study or rearrange everything on your desk. I want my ideas and thought processes to happen naturally and as they should, not to be constantly aware of whatever drug I’m taking.
I apologize for the verbosity of this post. I’d blame the Adderall if I could but I’ve discontinued it after deciding to try Piracetam + Choline Bitartrate for the first time. It’s in the mail from Smart Powders right now! I’m not aware of any contraindications of Piracetam with Adderall but in order to accurately assess the efficacy of the Piracetam I feel any other substance needs to be eliminated from the equation. That... and I’m looking for a more sustainable solution. I don’t want to keep popping Adderall XR’s and seeing as it only provides relief for a fraction of my symptoms I can safely conclude it’s not the most effective form of treatment for me.
Any other ADHD-PI users care to share their regimens here? I’m a bit disheartened at how temperamental Piracetam seems to be based on what I’ve read on the boards but am giving it a go anyhow.
Be well.
Edited by semi-retarded-individual, 26 May 2010 - 04:16 AM.