I would so much appreciate some help with my very worn out body. I am so young and used to be healthy but I just had a physical and my body has gone from very healthy to stressed out and in a rapid health decline in just 2 years. I essentially feel worn out all the time, but here is a little background..
I have suffered from ADD since I was a child. I am 27 years old now and am still so ADD to the point where it really affects the quality of my life. I have been on either adderall or vyvanse for many years. I stopped taking adderall in college and started taking vyvanse and it changed my life for the better.
Like I said, I am under an extreme amount of stress. I got married at 25 and my husband got sick overnight a few short months after. Basically I took him to the doctor with a headache and within 6 hours he was in brain surgery where they found a Stage IV glioblastoma Multiforme tumor. My life was forever changed. If you don't know anything about this tumor just google it and you will see how destructive this type of cancer is. One of the hardest to kill because it has thousands of tentacles and multiplies exponentially, growing all up, in, and around the rest of the brain. I believe the longest (past their diagnosis) anyone has ever lived is 5 years. The average lifespan post diagnosis is 6 months. They gave my husband 4 months. This was 2 years ago. Also his Mother AND my uncle died from this same exact tumor- both several months after their diagnosis. I tell you this because it adds to the emotional distress and our anger towards this awful dance.r
Since that awful day on April 22, 2012, he has undergone 3 brain surgeries. We actually just finished a trial at Duke where they injected the Polio virus into his tumor. This was insanely hard to get into and he is only the 11th person to do it. It is very risky. however, this was really his only shot at life. his tumor had relapsed a 4th time and they had just given him a few weeks to live. Then we did the trial. That was a month ago.
We don't know if it's working but I have a feeling it is because his symptoms have changed. Anyway, the amount of stress that comes with this is truly so large that I could never even comprehend this kind of grief, emotional roller coaster, and just havoc that it can reek on a family- from physical to emotional and financial to romantic havoc. Just think about every sinlge aspect of your life being torn apart.
Now I hate to be a debbie downer. I will say that we feel TRULY blessed that he is alive and we are so grateful for this trial. I just want to let you know what my life is like so that you might understand what my body has gone through. I have always been in shape and over the last 2 years I have lost a lot of muscle. I do not eat well although I am trying to get on a better diet. I went through a very tumultuous period (even for this situation) where so many doctors had put me on so many different types of drugs and I didn't even know what it was like to really feel. I do not and will not take any benzodiazepines anymore. I don't really drink anymore and I am just trying to be healthy.
So, I've read up on supplements and racetams and have just recently tried to put together some stacks especially after I tried noopept (the first few times I tried it I took it right) and phenibut. I had a great first few experiences with them.
Anyway, I am looking to have:
-more energy (physical and mental)
-more focus
-reduce stress
*not sure if there is anything to reduce cortisol or its affects on body but I have read that there are things out there
-mental prowess
I had to quit my job 2 years ago and I am currently trying to get back in the workforce. I am very intelligent and creative but I feel like my brain has been through so much and has not been exercised properly due to not working.
-I want a healthy brain (or do whatever I can to protect it)
-boost mood
* suffer from depression but I am an overall easy going person. However, due to my husband's condition, sometimes it is like living with an angry monster. He gets very mad at me for small (often irrational) things and I have turned into this person who is scared and has no self esteem. I literally have ALWAYS had a very healthy self esteem, been driven, motivated, and a people person but I do not feel that way now. I am hoping some of this will change when I start working again because Lord knows it is so unhealthy for me being in our house day in and day out. We had to sell my car so I can rarely leave the house.
-Motivation (I know these are all things that come from within but if there is anything that helps I would love to know)
Okay so I know this was very long. I would appreciate anyone's help. Below is a list of what I currently have at my house and have been experimenting with (not all at once or together):
-noopept
-phenibut
-phenylpiracetam (haven't had any luck with this)
-phenylethylamine (has worked a few times with hordenine for motivation and focus)
-True Focus
-NAC
-Choline Bitrate
-CPD Choline
I also take magnesium, fish oil, vitamin C, selenium, resveratrol, B-2, Alpha Lipoic Acid
I just ordered a few more:
Picamilon
Mucuna Pruriens Extract 98% L-DOPA
Ashwagandha Extract Bulk Powder (2.5% Withanolides)
Sulbutiamine Bulk Powder
Vinpocetine Supplement 10%
Griffonia Seed Extract (5-HTP)
Acetyl L-Carnitine Powder (ALCAR)
Thank you in advance to anyone that helps and thank you so much to everyone who has already helped.
Edited by BStooks, 02 June 2014 - 05:23 PM.