135 replies to this topic

[Quaker32]

I know this is a forum for biological help mainly of mental health problems, but if you have any idea as to what is going on psychologically and what would help, then PLEASE let me know. 

 

The first thing to say is that I have been diagnosed as suffering from sex addiction and last year I felt that I lost control of this addiction, and I went to group therapy for this problem (I have made the other ahead about sex addiction).

 

About the same time this happened, I started attending a 12-step group for sex addiction. I believe that my attempted immersion into the program produced extremely severe cognitive dissonance. The 12 steps are all about prayer and god etc, which were completely alien to my atheist self. But I started praying, becoming a born-again christian and doing all these crazy things because I was so scared of relapsing back into the addiction. My mind was telling me not to do this and that it did not feel genuine but I tried to hard to convince myself out of fear of where the addiction might take me.

 

One day when I was in my bedroom on the floor, I was kneeling and praying and said some Jesus Christ prayer. I previously ignored ALL of the alarm bells my mind was giving me saying that "this is not me, wtf", and pushed on.

 

I had my eyes shut that that moment and saw my entire psyche accelerate forward (like when your eyes are shut, you have the red dots etc, i saw those rush forward with intense energy). Maybe my mind got stuck in this "new" fixed position, I don't know. At the same time at this, I heard this high pitched ringing sound and my mind went completely blank. All of my thoughts, voices of my ego etc, have completely disappeared. 

 

On top of that, after the relapse, I had this awful sense of wanting to go back into my addiction and not pursue recovery. Of course, this pursuing any addiction is incredibly dangerous with severe consequences, so I can only describe this as "wrestling" my mind to change my mind into becoming recovery-focused. 

 

I've had somatic symptoms accompanying this blank mind of having "air currents" inside the top of my head and bulging round eyes.

 

I hope you can read this and it makes sense, but I have never ever even fucking heard of anything like this. Stupid of me, but I was desperate at the time to recover and not relapse that I ignored any signs of this being dangerous. Now I am completely scared that I a stuck like this forever. How can I re-build my old mind? Is that even possible?

 

I know this sounds crazy, and is probably not what you are expecting, but I do not have a clue about what to do and am badly freaking out.

 

THANK YOU TO ANYONE WHO CAN HELP ME IN THIS AWFUL MESS.

[Mind_Paralysis]

It sounds like you had a mild psychosis.

Brought on by extreme stress, and you pushing yourself to the brink -

 

- interesting that I have done so myself, several times but never had any psychosis, even with sleep-deprivation - but perhaps as I theorized when I built a model of ADHD based around the hypothesis that the neurobiology is INVERTED from Schizophrenia, this then actually means that I truly AM super-resistant to psychosis.

Perhaps psychosis is actually a sign of health in some models of neurology... if you push yourself too high, eventually perhaps one really should have a psychotic moment.

 

 

It's hard to give too many ideas about what to do here, but, perhaps a few tricks from regular burnout may be useful...

 

NSI-189 + Tianeptine - if you suffered brain-damage because of this, then NSI-189 might help with getting your cognition back - interestingly enough, some people have reported that it DECREASES CRAVINGS..! 0_o So perhaps it could be useful for those problems as well.

 

Tianeptine - well, you're an addiction-type, so perhaps not a good idea - it affects the opiate-system, while also increasing dopamine - reason I'm suggesting it is because it also helps with trauma-recovery - it alters ones response to stress, with time - makes you more chilled out, and you seem rather stressed.

 

Something like a Kappa-ANtagonist might be useful for you as well - if extreme fear is what triggered this attack, which it does sound like, is the cause, then it might help - it extinguishes fear-response, since you no longer feel the burden of punishment.

 

It's hard to say if that's a good thing either though... because you have addiction-issues, and then things get tricky... would altering your punishment-response be a good idea? Generally the scientists seem to believe altering your reward-response is better - naltrexone and nicotine-antagonism. Lowering your punishment-response could either make it so you feel less need for reward, OR... make you more reward-prone, since you would no longer fear things going to h*ll in a hand-basket because of failure or mistakes.

[Quaker32]

stink, thank you as always. 

 

i think that the imagt has made things worse for me. i have a persistent ringing and buzzing in my ears as well. 

 

is there anything that i can take to undo this? i only have NAC at hand. i read a thread about ibogaine making somebody's mind going blank and they suspected it was due to the nada receptor antagonism. d-serine and glycine was recommended. 

 

be careful with that stuff if you have had dissociation problems. 

[Mind_Paralysis]

stink, thank you as always. 

 

i think that the imagt has made things worse for me. i have a persistent ringing and buzzing in my ears as well. 

 

is there anything that i can take to undo this? i only have NAC at hand. i read a thread about ibogaine making somebody's mind going blank and they suspected it was due to the nada receptor antagonism. d-serine and glycine was recommended. 

 

be careful with that stuff if you have had dissociation problems. 

 

Now that's curious! Ringing and buzzing in your ears..? Sounds like bloody tinnitus! Was it you who said that you actually had MagLT with another compound in there as well? I can't for the life of me remember what it was called...

 

Anyways, I've been doing what I think is even higher dose than you - 3,3 grams in total, and I haven't had any trouble whatsoever.

 

It should, however, be noted that according to research-data, ADHD-cohorts have hyperactivity in the NMDA-network, caused by problems with metabolising tryptophan, meaning that we get problems with melatonin and Kynurenic acid not being produced enough - as such... we can take pretty god-damn HARD NMDA-antagonism before we notice anything whatsoever.

 

Strangely enough I had a little bit of dissociation once, following a very long and arduous depression (we had multiple death-cases in our family, so things were pretty intense), yet I seem to be able to just shug it in when it comes to Magnesium.

 

But cheers for the warning mate.

 

 

I'll try and look into this tomorrow, see if I can find anything about NMDA-antagonism and tinnitus, and how to potentially treat various forms of tinnitus.

 

Btw, how is the cravings these days? Have you tried Paroxetine yet?
If I was you, and I actually knew that it works, which you do, then I wouldn't hesitate for a second.

 

 

PS: Just realized that seeing as you've had a psychosis, and NMDA-antagonism is implicated in the pathology of psychosis-disorders... well... then it was probably not a good thing to try out NMDA-antagonism. If it was me that led you to trying it, then I deeply apologize! : ( (I honestly can't remember if it was...)

[Quaker32]

Stink, in truth, and i have to be honest here, i am in an exceptionally bad way with my mental health and tried to end it on wednesday. i am still here.

 

i think the maglt possibly sent me into some sort of psychosis. the naturopath was going to give it to me anyway, even if it wasn't suggested here. 

 

i think the psychological events of this year have completely destroyed me. i am going to a day treatment unit tomorrow (probably every day next week) and i hope to get the right kind of help there.

 

because of the mental dissonance and confusion i explained in my original post, i am completely psychologically dissociated and i have no idea who i am. my mind feels different and not in a good way at all.

 

i was getting sensations of air currents moving in my head and over my hair, and my face being elongated and compressed in certain parts. does that sound like psychosis?

 

i have no idea how to undo this psychological damage but that's not my job is it. I'm very scared. 

i had MagLT with Inosital in there. I was only taking one recommended dose a day. far too much obviously for me. 

[pamojja]

i was getting sensations of air currents moving in my head and over my hair, and my face being elongated and compressed in certain parts. does that sound like psychosis?
 
i have no idea how to undo this psychological damage but that's not my job is it. I'm very scared.

 

No expert in psychosis. But such strange sensations can become apparent for some during extensive meditation practice. They usually go away after practicing. However, do know a good friend who suffered severely from such symptoms. After finding not much help from meditation teachers and reading everything about such phenomena, he associated it himself with a painful kundalini awakening.

 

Do you have any spiritual aspiration which could help you through?

[psychejunkie]

rant: I cant believe people of this forum start to suggest chemicals like chocolates!

 

Quaker3, I don't think you had a psychosis that moment by the way;

any kind of spiritual practice have several impacts on mental workings and understanding of reality which can even become "reality" or "real events" that we call "mystical experiences".

there are lots of people practicing magick and occult practices just to get to that point of Ecstasy, without any serious mental problem!

what you had experienced might be called "oneness with universe" or "God's presence" by someone who have faith in what his/her is doing, but in your case you didn't know what is happening, so its annoying and feels like problem, of course!

 

Don't do anything spiritual or religious until you have faith in what you're doing, otherwise those can be dangerous for your mental health.

Edited by psychejunkie, 24 October 2016 - 05:12 AM.

[Connor MacLeod]

Hi Quaker32,

 

I've been away for a long while, but just checked in and noticed your post. I've done traditional yoga (not the stuff practiced in the studio) for a good while, and what you describe sounds pretty familiar. The sounds, definitely -- usually like a bell or a flute; occasionally like the sound of a jet engine or train (I have other friends who've described hearing high-pitched sounds.) I'm able hear the sounds most of the time, but they are stronger when I'm meditating deeply and regularly. They have never been unpleasant, and are generally associated with a feeling of lightness and joy, and a mild pleasant sensation over the surface of the body. I'm quite certain, at least in my case, that this is not tinnitus. As far as the feeling of air in the head, I always have this feeling of energy moving around my head. The feeling is strongest at the top of the head, in between the eyebrows, at the place where the hair whorls, and at the base of the skull. There is also a feeling a energy along the spine. Like the sounds, these sensations are generally very pleasant, and when I'm practicing deeply they can become very intensely blissful.

 

Anyway, I'm not saying for certain this is what is happening to you, but you might want to at least consider the possibility that what has happened to you is what yogis or Taoist cultivators would consider a sort of spiritual awakening or at least a step towards spiritual awakening.

 

Edited by Connor MacLeod, 24 October 2016 - 07:25 AM.

[gamesguru]

first of all, magnesium (unless you're deficient) and inositol will do absolutely nothing for borderline schizophrenia.  try something like ginkgo, noni, alstonine, Lonchocarpus cyanescens, or reserpine.  or even call in the big guns: clozapine/risperidone/olazopine/haloperidol, vortioxetine/citalopram, buspirone, riluzole, lithium etc.

[Quaker32]

Thank you to everybody who posted.

 

I never ever had any faith in those practices, otherwise I wouldn't be posting here, and I feel so intensely depersonalised. I have no idea who I am. 

 

When I had that mind-breaking moment, my brain fog disappeared as well and it feels like I am in a different position inside my head. Reality looks completely different. 

 

And the perceptual abnormalities?

 

Every second, this is complete hell for me. Is there ANY way of reversing this? Can I get my old mind back?

 

My theory is that a new "I" was created by the severely intense and sustained dissonance. And now the confusion over WHO is that "I' has set in. 

 

Quaker32 literally does not know who he is. My subjective sense of "I" and how familiar that feels, has vanished, 

 

I don't even know how I could drive myself to that point. It didn't feel good. It felt awful. What the fuck have i done. why didn't i stop.

 

I don;t have any spiritual practice and I have no intention of either. 

 

Edited by Quaker32, 24 October 2016 - 05:47 PM.

[Connor MacLeod]

Thank you to everybody who posted.

 

I never ever had any faith in those practices, otherwise I wouldn't be posting here, and I feel so intensely depersonalised. I have no idea who I am. 

 

When I had that mind-breaking moment, my brain fog disappeared as well and it feels like I am in a different position inside my head. Reality looks completely different. 

 

And the perceptual abnormalities?

 

Every second, this is complete hell for me. Is there ANY way of reversing this? Can I get my old mind back?

 

My theory is that a new "I" was created by the severely intense and sustained dissonance. And now the confusion over WHO is that "I' has set in. 

 

Quaker32 literally does not know who he is. My subjective sense of "I" and how familiar that feels, has vanished, 

 

I don't even know how I could drive myself to that point. It didn't feel good. It felt awful. What the fuck have i done. why didn't i stop.

 

I don;t have any spiritual practice and I have no intention of either. 

 

Well, the brain fog lifting sounds like a good thing, right? I'm not sure what you mean by your mind going blank, but there are times when I'm meditating that my breath becomes very slow and shallow (I guess it would be hard for someone to see I was breathing at all) and my mind becomes very quiet. There is a deep sense of peace and contentment. When I come out of meditation, however, my mind functions normally (but in a very calm focused manner.)

 

I've never had any unpleasant feelings of depersonalization in all my years of meditation. Perhaps I would have if these experiences had come on all the sudden instead of gradually? I don't know. Again, I don't know if what you're experiencing is related to what yogis or Taoist cultivators can experience, but the sounds and the feelings in the head that you describe do ring a bell. Also, the lifting of your brain fog is interesting because in my experience awakening of these "energies" in the spine and brain is extremely effective in attaining a sort of intensely focused, but calm state of mind (no nootropic can come close to that in my experience.) I love that calm focus, but for me it requires regular practice to maintain it.

 

Can you describe how the feelings of air in your head feel? Do you have any unusual feelings elsewhere in your body?

Edited by Connor MacLeod, 24 October 2016 - 07:22 PM.

[pamojja]

And the perceptual abnormalities?

 

Every second, this is complete hell for me. Is there ANY way of reversing this? Can I get my old mind back?

 

My theory is that a new "I" was created by the severely intense and sustained dissonance. And now the confusion over WHO is that "I' has set in. 

 

.. I don't even know how I could drive myself to that point. It didn't feel good. It felt awful. What the fuck have i done. why didn't i stop.

 

I don;t have any spiritual practice and I have no intention of either. 

 

If one pushes the limits of one's habitual self, as in spiritual practices or such a brute force perversion of it, as in your case, perceptual abnormalities might set in, the new self is rather in a state of fluctuation with at first no way to know who is that 'I'.

 

It could be extremely consciousness expanding and blissful, or painful if one wishes nothing than the old delusional fragile self back.

 

 

The first thing to say is that I have been diagnosed as suffering from sex addiction and last year I felt that I lost control of this addiction, and I went to group therapy for this problem (I have made the other ahead about sex addiction).

 

You didn't stop and drove yourself to that point, because you really wanted to get rid of your old mind!

 

Now you can only try to be as much equanimous as you can with such phenomena. Fighting your own mind is what got you to this point. It's reinforcing and a vicious cycle. Being at ease with whatever is, however painful, will allow it to pass on.

 

A simple exercise, like becoming aware of each in and out- breath, focusing of the bodily sensation of each breath, might help you through the worst turmoil.

 

Good luck!

Edited by pamojja, 24 October 2016 - 06:49 PM.

[Quaker32]

Does that mean that it can go back? If you are saying it can pass on? If I remove this stress and brute force (which I have), do you think it can come back again?

 

I want my old self back. I feel utterly and completely different and the very sense of "I" has totally shifted. When I said that my brain fog has lifted, I really mean that my old mind and sense of "I" exploded/vanished in an instant when I had that moment in my bedroom and my mind felt like it had broken through the prayer.

 

Through the brute force of it all.

 

About 30 minutes ago I read some of the stuff I read earlier in the year, and the 12-steps, and realised that I really don't believe or acceptany of it at all. 

 

No wonder I have literally driven myself into this state and it feels so so so bad. I never believed any of it and pushed it on and on. 

 

Is there anybody that you recommend I talk to? Psychologist, trauma specialist, EMDR, hypnotherapy, spiritual person etc....?

 

thank you.

 

it felt like air currents in my head and i felt it over my scalp. i had the perceptual things, and the actual view of the world is different from my perspective. 

 

"I" am in a new place in my head. 

 

 

 

 

Edited by Quaker32, 24 October 2016 - 07:37 PM.

[pamojja]

Does that mean that it can go back? If you are saying it can pass on? If I remove this stress and brute force (which I have), do you think it can come back again?

 

I want my old self back.

 

That's the difficulty you find yourself in.

 

Now you can only try to be as much equanimous as you can with such phenomena. Fighting your own mind is what got you to this point. It's reinforcing and a vicious cycle. Being at ease with whatever is, however painful, will allow it to pass on.

 

It can go and pass on. But you have to stop wanting it that much. Being at ease with whatever is, arises from the experience that everything that comes about through certain preconditions, with the ceasing of its conditions will pass. No doubt.

 

Is there anybody that you recommend I talk to? Psychologist, trauma specialist, EMDR, hypnotherapy, spiritual person etc....?

 

thank you.

 

it felt like air currents in my head and i felt it over my scalp. i had the perceptual things, and the actual view of the world is different from my perspective. 

 

"I" am in a new place in my head. 

 

If you find a trustworthy person it's worth to talk to. But difficult to find.

 

Don't put too much emphasis on the perceptual things, they mean nothing more than to bring you back to the experience of now that is you. It will pass.

 

[Quaker32]

thanks pam.

 

i find it so hard to not want it that much. its all I'm thinking about. i will try harder to distract myself.

 

also, 

I'm wondering if its worth taking something to reverse the effect of the NMDA-antagonism of the iMAGT. i also had a about 0.5g iboga TA spread out over several microdoses, about 3 weeks ago, which purportedly has nmda-antagonistic effects as well. I've had a 2.4g of NAC over the last 3 days (each day), but i want to ask here first before i go and make more damage....

[jack black]

OP: pardon my ignorance here, are you talking about Dissociative disorder?

 

https://en.wikipedia...iative_disorder

[Connor MacLeod]

Through the brute force of it all.it felt like air currents in my head and i felt it over my scalp. i had the perceptual things, and the actual view of the world is different from my perspective.

 

Yeah, I always have that feeling on the scalp. It feels a bit like oil pouring over the head or maybe ants crawling around. There's a feeling almost like energy "burrowing" new paths, etc. I can feel it on my head and along my spine pretty much all the time. It is generally quite pleasant, but if I don't meditate regularly it can start to take on a little bit of a "raw" edge. I take this as an indication that I need to adjust my lifestyle. If I meditate a lot it is very blissful.

 

 

I don;t have any spiritual practice and I have no intention of either.

 

Spiritual practices (meditation, chi gong, pranayama, even prayer) can awaken a process in the body/mind (some people call this kundalini.) But once this process is started up it kind of does its own thing. At that point you almost become the observer to this process. It is pretty uncanny. What I've found is that the "energy" moves around the spine to the various chakras as if it knows what it needs to do to clear stuff up. For a person who is experiencing this, I think it is possible to assist the process by living in a way that is harmonious with the process. For me that entailed meditating at regular times (I knew it was time to meditate because my chakras would start "buzzing" with energy and it became very hard to do anything else), getting sufficient sleep and sleeping at regular times (generally right after meditation), moderation in sex (sexual potency was strong, but also easily controlled), etc.

Edited by Connor MacLeod, 24 October 2016 - 09:37 PM.

[Heisok]

"Stink, in truth, and i have to be honest here, i am in an exceptionally bad way with my mental health and tried to end it on wednesday. i am still here."

 

Please follow the care recommended by a professional, and stop medicating yourself with various home/internet prescribed chemicals. I do not believe that ultimately a Psychiatrist is your long term solution, but they should be able to help you to stabilize.

 

As far as the spiritual, meditation and other lifestyle recommendations, I am sure that they would fit in fine.

 

 

Edited by Heisok, 25 October 2016 - 01:14 AM.

[Quaker32]

heisok, what do you believe is my long-term solution to this? (you said the psychiatrist isn't...and i guess a medication probably isn't going to be)

[Heisok]

Quaker32, I wish that I had the answer.

 

My point about the Psychiatrist was that I know they can have the knowledge, and experience to help you get past the crisis situation you appear to be in. Help you to protect yourself . Medications might be part of the solution short and long term. I do not know. What does not appear to be working right now is taking chemicals which you think might help based on your research. Maybe write down everything that you have tried in the past including supplements and drugs . How each one seemed to effect you. Discuss this with the doctor. This might help them to develop a treatment plan for you.

 

I think that diet, exercise, meditation or other spiritual practices are very important, but they take time .

 

heisok, what do you believe is my long-term solution to this? (you said the psychiatrist isn't...and i guess a medication probably isn't going to be)

 

Edited by Heisok, 25 October 2016 - 01:59 PM.

[Valor5]

You may have had a stroke in the basal ganglia. If that is the case I dont think there is a cure. It was probably because of you stressing out. You can cause yourself a stroke. You should get checked immediately for that.

[gamesguru]

a stroke in the basal ganglia... I dont think there is a cure

 

My amusement is two-fold.  Firstly, the basal ganglia disease (which can explain Huntington's and Parkinson's) wouldn't explain the dramatic dissociation.  Secondly, basal ganglia is one of the few brain regions actually capable of healing itself.  Lol x2.  And fwiw stress is most unlikely to precipitate a stroke in the healthiest eaters.

Basal ganglia function, stuttering, sequencing, and repair in adult songbirds
Neurogenesis in the Basal Ganglia in Huntington’s Disease in the Human Brain and in an Animal Model

Clin Exp Pharmacol Physiol. 2007 May-Jun;34(5-6):528-32.

Progenitor cells and adult neurogenesis in neurodegenerative diseases and injuries of the basal ganglia.

Curtis MA¹, Eriksson PS, Faull RL.

 

Abstract

1. The subventricular zone (SVZ) of the forebrain that overlies the caudate nucleus is one of the principal brain regions in which neurogenesis occurs in the human brain, throughout life. 2. In response to the degeneration that occurs in the caudate nucleus in Huntington's disease, or in the caudate nucleus or cortex in stroke models, the SVZ increases the production of progenitor cells that migrate towards the site of the damage where they can differentiate into mature neurons and glial cells. The SVZ contains three main cell types and these are progenitor cells, glial cells and migratory neuroblasts; glial cells are the most common cell type and, in response to Huntington's disease, most of the SVZ cell proliferation is glial, but the number of precursor and neuroblasts is also increased. 3. The SVZ is enriched in neuroactive compounds, such as neuropeptide Y and gamma-aminobutyric acid receptor subunits gamma2, which stimulate ongoing neurogenesis. Interestingly, these stimulating cues are upregulated in the SVZ in response to Huntington's disease. Thus, the SVZ comprises heterogeneous cell types that are maintained in an environment that is permissive to neurogenesis and gliogenesis, and responds to neurodegenerative changes in adjacent brain regions by increasing progenitor cell proliferation and neurogenesis in an attempt to replace the cells that die as a result of neurodegeneration.

[psychejunkie]

Does that mean that it can go back? If you are saying it can pass on? If I remove this stress and brute force (which I have), do you think it can come back again?

 

I want my old self back. I feel utterly and completely different and the very sense of "I" has totally shifted. When I said that my brain fog has lifted, I really mean that my old mind and sense of "I" exploded/vanished in an instant when I had that moment in my bedroom and my mind felt like it had broken through the prayer.

 

Through the brute force of it all.

 

About 30 minutes ago I read some of the stuff I read earlier in the year, and the 12-steps, and realised that I really don't believe or acceptany of it at all. 

 

No wonder I have literally driven myself into this state and it feels so so so bad. I never believed any of it and pushed it on and on. 

 

Is there anybody that you recommend I talk to? Psychologist, trauma specialist, EMDR, hypnotherapy, spiritual person etc....?

 

thank you.

 

it felt like air currents in my head and i felt it over my scalp. i had the perceptual things, and the actual view of the world is different from my perspective. 

 

"I" am in a new place in my head. 

 

 

You should start to relax; by aerobic exercise and reading novels.

this'd reverse your changes

[Valor5]

 

a stroke in the basal ganglia... I dont think there is a cure

 

My amusement is two-fold.  Firstly, the basal ganglia disease (which can explain Huntington's and Parkinson's) wouldn't explain the dramatic dissociation.  Secondly, basal ganglia is one of the few brain regions actually capable of healing itself.  Lol x2.  And fwiw stress is most unlikely to precipitate a stroke in the healthiest eaters.

Basal ganglia function, stuttering, sequencing, and repair in adult songbirds
Neurogenesis in the Basal Ganglia in Huntington’s Disease in the Human Brain and in an Animal Model

Clin Exp Pharmacol Physiol. 2007 May-Jun;34(5-6):528-32.

Progenitor cells and adult neurogenesis in neurodegenerative diseases and injuries of the basal ganglia.

Curtis MA¹, Eriksson PS, Faull RL.

 

Abstract

1. The subventricular zone (SVZ) of the forebrain that overlies the caudate nucleus is one of the principal brain regions in which neurogenesis occurs in the human brain, throughout life. 2. In response to the degeneration that occurs in the caudate nucleus in Huntington's disease, or in the caudate nucleus or cortex in stroke models, the SVZ increases the production of progenitor cells that migrate towards the site of the damage where they can differentiate into mature neurons and glial cells. The SVZ contains three main cell types and these are progenitor cells, glial cells and migratory neuroblasts; glial cells are the most common cell type and, in response to Huntington's disease, most of the SVZ cell proliferation is glial, but the number of precursor and neuroblasts is also increased. 3. The SVZ is enriched in neuroactive compounds, such as neuropeptide Y and gamma-aminobutyric acid receptor subunits gamma2, which stimulate ongoing neurogenesis. Interestingly, these stimulating cues are upregulated in the SVZ in response to Huntington's disease. Thus, the SVZ comprises heterogeneous cell types that are maintained in an environment that is permissive to neurogenesis and gliogenesis, and responds to neurodegenerative changes in adjacent brain regions by increasing progenitor cell proliferation and neurogenesis in an attempt to replace the cells that die as a result of neurodegeneration.

 

You´ve just jumped in and discredited everything I said. Stress can cause a stroke. I don´t care what you think. It does and can, period. There is a particular artery near the center, I can´t recall the name, but it branches out from the center. Strokes from that particular artery can affect different regions. The area I meant to say is the Striatum, which I believe is a composite. The reason I say all this is from the first chapter if I recall correctly from the book, Smarter, Better, Faster by Charles Duhigg in which a very successful business man with what seemed like a good and productive life took a trip to South America in which he went to a particularly high altitude with low oxygen and for whatever reason although nothing happened to his wife he experienced a stroke in the striatum and he was reduced to a person who was content to sit down and watch TV all day. 

 

There are damaged structures as well an intracellular mechanisms that can be affected not only by the stroke itself but perhaps by a past habit-lifestyle or genetics. Rehabilitiation is not as polyanna as you would perhaps like to believe. That is why I feel it is strongly recommended to determine if something is a stroke. Like Dr. Amen says, ¨how do you know if you don´t look?¨

[gamesguru]

How come nothing happened to his wife? Genetics and past lifestyle habits.. stress may contribute to strokes, but is unlikely to cause one if youre super healthy.

The striatum also births neurons, but yes after a severe stroke, the idea that the region will heal itself completely.. is nonsense. We're talking about 900 neurons per day being generated in a region where 600 million were wiped out. Clearly an aggressive approach is called for.. mesh implants, proliferation accelators, stem cells, hyperbaric treatment, potent supplements (for the intracellular disruptions, and to multiply the 900 neurons per day to a much higher number)


It's easy to get paranoid and get caught up thinking any brain fart is a stroke. The smaller and less obvious the stroke, the harder it is to detect. I may have had a minor one on hippy flip, who knows?

[Valor5]

J Stem Cells Regen Med. 2016 May 30;12(1):25-35. eCollection 2016.

The Effect of Pro-Neurogenic Gene Expression on Adult Subventricular Zone Precursor Cell Recruitment and Fate Determination After Excitotoxic Brain Injury.
Jones KS1, Connor BJ1.
Author information
Abstract
Despite the presence of on-going neurogenesis in the adult mammalian brain, neurons are generally not replaced after injury. Using a rodent model of excitotoxic cell loss and retroviral (RV) lineage tracing, we previously demonstrated transient recruitment of precursor cells from the subventricular zone (SVZ) into the lesioned striatum. In the current study we determined that these cells included migratory neuroblasts and oligodendrocyte precursor cells (OPC), with the predominant response from glial cells. We attempted to override this glial response by ectopic expression of the pro-neurogenic genes Pax6 or Dlx2 in the adult rat SVZ following quinolinic acid lesioning. RV-Dlx2 over-expression stimulated repair at a previously non-neurogenic time point by enhancing neuroblast recruitment and the percentage of cells that retained a neuronal fate within the lesioned area, compared to RV-GFP controls. RV-Pax6 expression was unsuccessful at inhibiting glial fate and intriguingly, increased OPC cell numbers with no change in neuronal recruitment. These findings suggest that gene choice is important when attempting to augment endogenous repair as the lesioned environment can overcome pro-neurogenic gene expression. Dlx2 over-expression however was able to partially overcome an anti-neuronal environment and therefore is a promising candidate for further study of striatal regeneration.

Edited by Valor5, 05 November 2016 - 02:10 AM.

[jack black]

The reason I say all this is from the first chapter if I recall correctly from the book, Smarter, Better, Faster by Charles Duhigg in which a very successful business man with what seemed like a good and productive life took a trip to South America in which he went to a particularly high altitude with low oxygen and for whatever reason although nothing happened to his wife he experienced a stroke in the striatum and he was reduced to a person who was content to sit down and watch TV all day.

I looked it up. True story. The guy just died in 2014 at age of 87. I bet he was happy while watching TV.

[Valor5]

The reason I say all this is from the first chapter if I recall correctly from the book, Smarter, Better, Faster by Charles Duhigg in which a very successful business man with what seemed like a good and productive life took a trip to South America in which he went to a particularly high altitude with low oxygen and for whatever reason although nothing happened to his wife he experienced a stroke in the striatum and he was reduced to a person who was content to sit down and watch TV all day.

I looked it up. True story. The guy just died in 2014 at age of 87. I bet he was happy while watching TV.

Before stroke he would change channels ect. After stroke it would just stay on one channel. I know you are being sarcastic but I highly doubt happiness after a stroke is the same. Perhaps a stroke that demolishes the right hemisphere anyway. My 2 cents.


Seizure. 1999 Apr;8(2):116-9.
Emotional status after right vs. left temporal lobectomy.
Burton LA1, Labar D.
Author information
Abstract
Nineteen temporal lobectomy patients with epilepsy were evaluated (11 right and 8 left) with a brief questionnaire that addressed: (1) General Happiness; (2) Depression; (3) Anxiety; (4) Impulse Control; and (5) Socialization. The patients with left temporal lobectomy reported increases in depression and decreases in socialization compared with the right temporal lobectomy patients after surgery. Furthermore although the right temporal lobectomy patients reported increases in general happiness, no changes in general happiness were reported by the left temporal lobectomy patients. The present study supported the idea that an increased negative affect is associated with left rather than right temporal lobectomy. This is consistent with a model of negative emotional valence when the right hemisphere dominates awareness

Edited by Valor5, 05 November 2016 - 08:58 PM.

[William Finch]

What you are describing sounds very similar to an experience found in many traditions/and non traditions. Read this http://integrateddan...d-passing-away/

[Quaker32]

I just want to clarify.I do not mean that my viewpoint as in opinion ha changed (like my viewpoint on religion or politics for example).

 

My first person perspective of where "I" am has physically changed! On top of that, it feels like I am outside of my head and body.

 

Could I have induced brain damage? Or trauma related given the intense awful shitness of my time in these groups? 

 

Numerous people have said this could be a spiritual thing but it doesn't seem spiritual to me. 

 

I have been given sertraline by the psychiatrist.I am going upto 100mg daily soon. I am taking lorezepam and promethazine PRN. I am also taking iron tablets based on blood test results. I am waiting for psychological help.

 

I'm really finding it hard to get used to thevery real visual changes of everything appearing brighter and more pronounced. On top of that, it feels like the person looking through my eyes is not "me". !! 

 

I have told the doctor about the headaches/air currents and the strange sensation of my head changing size/shape and being tied up like a balloon in a box.

 

This experience of suffering has taught me so much. I have my whole life and future ahead and I will never do things like this again.

 

Also killing me, is the blank mind. No daydreaming, ability to imagine and visualize has gone.No internal chatter. I used to have a million thoughts per second in that bubble where "I" was located. That's the configuration that Quaker32 identifies with.Hence why this feels foreign and I HAVE NO IDEA WHO I AM (I know my name, factual details etc).

 

The L-Mag T probably made things that much worse. I had a moment of psychosis last week where I thought I was Jesus. That hasn't returned, luckily.