This is a long story but I'll make it as clear and succinct as possible. Male, upper 30s. Before getting sick I was a very capable, high functioning man who never had any noteworthy mental health issues.
Two years ago I began experiencing persistent "brain fog" which manifested itself as a feeling of lightheadedness and wooziness. I never had had this before in my life. I started seeing different types of doctors, and none could help me or explain what was going on. I was checked for vertigo, Meniere's Disease and abnormal blood sugar levels. All negative (my blood sugar is always between 90 - 120 which is optimal).
One year ago, I went through a traumatic time and I plunged into clinical depression (earlier in my life, other stressful times did not have the same result). Once depression hit me, the brain fog got worse, as did my tinnitus which got louder, and my visual snow which grew more visible in dark and low light conditions. For the past year, I've felt almost as if I've had a lobotomy; like I've lost IQ. It's like my brain is actually struggling to function. I feel a strange pressure inside my skull, like I can actually physically feel sensations of straining inside my brain. My depression is a case of "major depressive disorder with melancholic features", or melancholic depression (Google). Other than the thick brain fog, my depressive symptoms include:
- Near total anhedonia and loss of interest in formerly enjoyable activities.
- Extreme hopelessness; seeing life as pointless.
- Excessive feelings of guilt, inadequacy and regret.
- Frequent crying.
- Mood is noticeably worse in the morning.
- Persistent "ear worms".
- Waking up too early in the morning (terminal insomnia).
- Loss of libido.
- Suicidal ideation.
I started seeing therapists, psychiatrists and neurologists to try to figure out what was going on. Unfortunately, we have only been able to come up with some clues. Neurologist ordered a bunch of scans: three MRIs, an MRA, an EEG, BAER, and VER all came back normal. However, he also ordered SPECT and PET scans which showed abnormal results.
SPECT: "Moderate-severe hypoperfusion in the bilateral medial frontal lobes. There appears to be decreased perfusion to the basal ganglia, as well to the mesial temporal region, left more severe than right. Cerebral cortical perfusion is otherwise homogenous and symmetric in the remainder of the cerebrum."
PET: "There is marked diminished fluoro-2-deoxyglucose (FDG) activity involving the temporal lobes bilaterally, including the anterior temporal lobes. Diminished FDG activity also involves the hippocampal structures. Diminished FDG activity is present involving the anterior aspect of the cingulate gyrus. The posterior aspect of the cingulate gyrus and the precuneus gyrus demonstrate normal activity. There is no significant hypometabolism involving the frontal lobes, which demonstrate symmetric metabolism. This is discordant with the SPECT results. There is normal symmetric activity involving the parietal and occipital lobes. Normal cerebellar activity is present."
The big question that nobody seems to be able to answer is: did brain fog cause my depression, or did the depression cause the brain fog? If the depression caused the brain fog, then why did I have the fog for almost a year before the major depression struck me?
I was prescribed sertraline (Zoloft). I tried it for four days, and it increased my fogginess in a major way. I have tried bupropion (Wellbutrin) a few times, and it does seem to give me a little bump but I'm still far from normal. Interestingly, two medications that give me significant relief are amphetamine (Adderall) and methylphenidate (Ritalin). Adderall in particular almost fully lifts my depression, but after it wears off I return to a depressed state. However, I do not take these regularly, only as needed. Also tried an SNRI called Fetzima, which also made the fog worse but not as bad as Zoloft.
I thought I might have Lyme disease, but after multiple negative tests and many months on antibiotics with no improvement, I had to admit that I did not.
I have tried to do whatever I can to help myself over this past year, but with little or no progress. I have tried eating a lot better, drinking more water, doing cardio exercise several times a week, meditating several times a week, switched to decaf, sleeping more and forcing myself to engage in outside activities. I have also tried these supplements:
Fish oil
Vitamin D3
Acetyl-L-carnitine
Phosphatidylserine
Multivitamin
COQ10
Magnesium
Zinc
Tryptophan
5HTP
Acetyl-L-tyrosine
I have been through so many tests and had so much blood drawn, it's ridiculous. Almost everything is very normal and optimal, except for:
- Testosterone is low for my age group (around 325; should be over 600).
- FSH and LH keep coming back low.
- Vitamin D3 was low (25; is now in the 35-40 range which is okay).
- Pregnenolone was low (first 26, then less than 5).
- Tested IgG positive for Epstein-Barr Virus and mycoplasma pneumoniae (my infectious disease doctor said not to worry and that this only means that I had EBV and pneumonia some time previously in my life...which is odd because I don't recall ever having mononucleosis or pneumonia. Apparently the majority of people test positive for EBV antibodies).
- Possibly of interest: sometimes (once or twice monthly) I get "visual migraines with aura", where my vision gets all blurry for about 15 minutes. These episodes do not include headaches.
I ordered the "TruBrain" liquid supplement, and all it did was give me a slight headache and increased brain fog. To address the low testosterone, I went on testesterone replacement therapy for a couple months (via injection), but all it did was increase my libido.
I tried rTMS therapy, but after 20 sessions and very little improvement I stopped. I tried three infusions of ketamine which did seem to give me a little boost, but at $450 per session I could not justify continuing.
At this point, I am starting my fourth week of bupropion with some but not much improvement. If I don't see any noteworthy results in the new couple of weeks, I'll have to switch to another one. I am also looking into "deep TMS" which seems to be a little more effective than rTMS. As a very last resort, if I am still suffering like I have been I would be open to undergoing electroconvulsive therapy (ECT)...to save my life.
All over the Web there are people complaining about "brain fog" and looking for answers. It seems like modern medicine does not have any solution for them. I have read and been told that brain fog often accompanies depression, but I can't help but feel that my cognitive impairment and clouding of consciousness are something that's on a whole other level. Before I was depressed, I never had to deal with any of this crap. Why it chose to hit me at age 38 is a mystery that will probably never be solved.
I would be very appreciative of any feedback and suggestions that users of this site could offer. If you know anyone who might have some useful advice to share, please send them my post. Thanks so much.
Edited by DarkRiver, 28 May 2017 - 08:29 PM.