Okay Guys, first of all i have to point out that iam only able to write this text because i've just drunk a small glass of cola and the coffeine is giving me the motivation and concentration to do so.
For 3 years now iam dealing with multiple mental symptoms. It started with a foggy head and right now iam at the point where i suffer from depression, social anxiety, absolute lack of motivation, no emotions at all. But the worst of all is the chronic stress. Iam feeling 24/7 like my brain and my body are under electricity. I can not rest and even if i lay down and try to watch something i have to constantly do something else like checking my smartphone every 2 minutes or when lying in bed rubbing with my legs (ironically the only way iam able to fall asleep).
I've also got a weird ringing in my ears which sometimes disappears and sometimes drives me crazy. Additionally i have absolutely now libido.
I've done multiple tests over the years and all i can say is that iam physically healthy (at least)
Tests i've done:
- lyme negativ
- heavy metals (Hair mineral analyses) negativ - but low Lithium,Strontium,Magnesium,Selen
- Thyroid - was pretty bad (TSH 4.8) but after 1 year L-Thyroxin now perfect (TSH 0.91)
- Pyroluria negativ
- Neurotransmitter (Urine) : Adrenaline 1,4 4-10
Noradrenaline 13 32-58
Dopamine 120,6 90-220
Serotonin 59,6 148-230
Gaba 1,65 1,5-6,8
Glutamate 5,14 8-25
- Pregnenolone - was very low (seems to be always the case if low neurotransmitter)
- Homocysteine 5,5 (5.0 - 12)
- Tumor necrosis factor alpha 7,7 (<9)
Things i've tried:
- Alpha-Lipoic Acid 600mg
- L-Methylfolate 2x 250mcg a day + Vitamin B12
- Vitamin B6 + Zinc
- Magnesium, Selen, Vitamin D Suplements
- L-Tyrosin, L-Cysteine, L-Theanin
- GABA 750mg (as it doesn't cross the BBB i hade no hope but i tried)
- Pregnenolone up to 300mg a day over 3 months (no effect) --> higher doses resulted in bad sleep
- Lithium Ortate 225mg before bed ----> no effect at all
- Ritalin ----> that shit always tripped me out of life. I took as my doc said 20mg and after about 1 hour i had huge anxiety attacks my hands were ice cold and i thought i have to die
- Neurofeedback ----> good feeling during and about 10 minutes after a session than my brain goes back to "normal" mode
So here is the deal, as i already explained in my first sentence iam able to write this thanks to the coffeine of one fucking glas Coca Cola.
Before this shit started i drunk huge amounts of coffee and energy drinks and i always laughed about people complaining about coffeine. Well now iam at the point were i exactly have to dose the amount of coffeine i wanna take.
Give me regular cup of coffee and i get a little anxiety cold hands and after a few minutes iam spaced out and not a human beeing anymore.
Give me a glass of coca cola and suddenly i feel the urge to communicate, to discuss (to the point where i can not stop to talk and piss people off), i feel emotions better can laugh and tell jokes.
Srsly i've tried to understand this but i don't know what is happening in my brain at this point.
The problem is after about 3 hours - that's how long such a coffeine "rush" lasts - i fall into a deep lethargic hole where i experience bad derealization and no emotions at all. I always compare it to people who use Speed or Exctasy.
Another mysterious case is alcohol. I do not drink alcohol regularly as iam affraid it harms my brain too much. But at the weekend when i feel the need to do something with my friends i usually drink bigger amounts as it makes me feel way more sociable i can laugh and problems seem to be far away and the stress fades with every drink more.
The strange thing is that after such a night of heavy drinking, the next day i feel totally great!!! I mean okay physically not always of course there is poor circulation and sometimes a bit headache, but mentally i feel great.
During a Hangover i have zero stress, social anxiety, i can feel all the emotions, i get pretty horny - so nice to have a libido again - and i feel the need to do something with friends or my family. AND my ear ringing is completly GONE!!!
Usually this is the day after i drunk and if i drink really a lot it can last up to two days.
Although this feeling "to be the old me" is great, i don't want to follow this path. I know its not a solution but i really want to find out where this comes from. I've read in several other threads about it and tried some things, people suggested, but until now nothing helped.
I also did not take any Psychiatric medication because i know about the risks but to be honest after 3 years of suffering i guess if someone would prescribe me some i would give it a shot.
Last but not least i would like to add that about one year ago i started with running as i noticed to feel better after it. Lately I increased my runs up to one and a half hour and i noticed that after such a session i feel fucking great. Its almost like having a hangover, i can feel emotions even empathy which i lack pretty much, iam sociable AND my ear ringing is gone. All these improvments last up to about 3 hours before my brain decides to go back in the lethargic mode.
If anyone has any ideas what i could try please tell me, i highly appreciate it!!!
(and sorry for some grammar or word mistakes but english is unfortunately not my first language)
Edited by jfr, 31 May 2017 - 10:18 PM.